Game Review: Team Fortress 2 (PC)

       A few years ago, I had a fairly competent computer. It could run Valve’s Source engine without systematically crashing. But then my dad accidentally static’d the whole thing, and while it still worked, it’s USB ports went kaput. That meant no mouse, and unfortunately, no more gaming (It was a laptop, so I could still technically use it, but who wants to play “Half-Life 2” with a laptop’s touch pad?).

        Back when the laptop was still working, I played a fair bit of “Team Fortress 2”, a class-based FPS (or should I say the class-based FPS) that came bundled in Valve’s “Orange Box” package. My favorite classes were the Spy (a stealth-based class that can cloak, disguise as other players, and most importantly, assassinate important targets), and the Engineer (a defensive class who builds sentry guns, teleporters, and health/ammo dispensers to assist other teammates). Man, those were the days. But they all came to an unfortunate end.

        Thankfully, I received a new laptop recently, and since “Team Fortress 2” recently became free, I decided to give it a download, and man, has the experience changed.

        The core gameplay is the same as it’s always been, and I was easily able to get back into my old sneaky-Spy ways again. However, there are now much more options. New weapons and items can be unlocked (or bought as DLC), and while they aren’t necessarily better or worse than the default weapons, they do add variety to a playstyle. For example, I can play the Engineer as I always have, or I can equip him with the Gunslinger weapon, which in exchange for losing his tight defense, offers the Engie a more interesting, offensive playstyle.

        Also, since the game is now free, a lot more friends of mine are joining in. The community is a lot larger than it’s been in my prime, and with the new weapons, it seems like there’s an infinite number of different styles to each player. There are more maps, players, weapons, and features than most games I’ve ever played, and it successfully emulates a community in a video game, something I’ve very rarely seen done.

        And of course, I can’t praise the game’s cartoonish art style enough. It’s exaggerated enough to make every class look completely different, and in a game like this, that is a very good thing. It’s also insanely quotable, as every class spits out a lot of humorous dialogue upon killing or assisting other players. Back in the day, every map looked about the same, but now there’s a lot more variety, from the old typical “Wile E. Coyote” setting, to snow-capped mountains, to evil Bond-villain style hideouts. The music (which disappointingly only plays in the menus) is awesome in a super-villainous kind of way. (http://bit.ly/pYVhsq)

        So how does the game hold up compared to today’s modern war shooters? Really well. In fact, it’s still one of the best online experiences out there for PC, FPS or not. It’s replay value is off-the-charts (without having to rely on the sort of “Skinner Box” style shenanigans of the “Call of Duty” series). It proves that when you have an amazing art style, graphics don’t mean crap, and that an FPS doesn’t need to be dark or drab to be excellent. Does this mean that it’s the best multiplayer FPS out there? In my opinion, you bet it does.

Rating: *****

Chris's Top 5 Most Hated Trends of the Gaming Industry

      Don’t get me wrong. There are many recent trends in gaming that I really love. Aiming down sights? It makes kills more accurate and satisfying. Sandbox worlds? Under the right circumstances, they allow you to get totally lost in a game. But the thing is, there are way too much trends in our industry, new and old, that just absolutely need to go. For example...

#5: DIGITAL RIGHTS MANAGEMENT

       Those not familiar with DRM can go here (http://bit.ly/4GiiiG), but to the anyone else, the three above words make up one of the ugliest phrases in the entertainment industry. Of course, piracy doesn’t do much good to any industry, and I’m not a huge proponent of it, but with DRM, it seems like big companies like the MPAA just want to punish everybody instead of making the effort to focus just on pirates. Nobody likes DRM (except all the industry bigwigs), and it’s really, really high time it got up and quit. In fact, many media companies (like Apple) claim that their games/videos/songs are “DRM-free” just to rack up more sales. It’s no wonder those services are more popular than those with DRM. Sorry entertainment industry, but DRM has got to high-tail it out of here.

#4: THE GLUT OF SEQUELS

       How many of you actually got excited when the words “Halo 4” flashed on the screen at Microsoft’s E3 press conference this year? I didn’t. I didn’t get excited for “Gears of War 3” either. Or “Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 3”. Or “Dance Central 2”. Or “Kinect Sports Season 2”. Or “Forza Motorsport 4”. Or “Fable: the Journey”. Or “Halo Anniversary”. Or... well, you get the idea.

       You see how bad this is? Even Hollywood doesn’t churn out as many sequels. There were very, very few original games at E3 this year, and the gaming industry doesn’t realize that if all we get is sequels, sooner or later gamers are going to get sick of all these games. After all, wasn’t that what happened with the “Guitar Hero” franchise? I’m not saying we should abandon sequels completely, but I am saying that we need to cut some of them down and just get some original ideas going.

#3: THE OVERRELIANCE ON GRAPHICS AND “HARDCORE GAMING”

       Wanna know what my favorite console was this generation? Hint one: It’s not the PS3. Hint two: It’s not the 360, either. Hint 3: IT’S THE WII. Wanna know why? It’s because it was original. Unique. The games on it were actually intriguing. Games like “No More Heroes” and “Red Steel 2” (which is an actually good sequel, just so I don’t look like a hypocrite) couldn’t have been possible on 360 or PS3. Games were actually interesting, original, and most importantly, different. You also had first-party games like “Super Mario Galaxy” and “Metroid Prime 3” that also couldn’t have been done on any other console. Sure, PS3 and 360 had traditional controllers, and better graphics, but many of the games were just the same old, same old. My point is, what game companies need to understand these days is that at this point, graphics aren’t everything. I don’t think they can get much better than this anyway.

#2: LIVES AND GAME OVERS

       I just know that I’m going to sound like a huge sissy for saying this, but hear me out. Lives and the phrase “Game Over” have always been a part of the video game lexicon. But now we have no excuse to have them now. Nothing. Zip. Nada. A game with a finite number of lives and continues is no longer called “hard”, it’s now called “frustrating”. The only reason I ever tried to play “Super Mario Bros: The Lost Levels” is because it was the SNES “All-Stars” version and you could save anytime you wanted.

       For an example of how the game industry could do it right from now on, let’s look at a popular indie game called “Limbo”. In “Limbo”, whenever your character dies, you start again right before you died. That’s it. No lives, no game over. Just the game. It’s perfect, and helps draw you into the experience. Now if only we could get every new game to do this, then gaming would be less of a chore, and more of, well, a game.

#1: BUGS, CRASHES, PATCHES, GLITCHES, ETC.

       This is this gaming generation’s Achilles Heel. I can understand if a PC game crashes or has bugs, because everyone’s PC is different. But everyone’s console is the same. We know what parts are in it. We know how to optimize games for it. So why do we need to release a console game to the public if said game is nearly broken in every way? It’s just f***ing ridiculous.

       The PS3 versions of “The Orange Box” and “Fallout 3” were all but unplayable when they first released, and they had to be patched a few weeks after their releases. But why couldn’t you playtest it first and make sure everything works on day one? Your customers are not testers, they are actual consumers paying you good money for a finished game, not an incomplete one. Hell, that’s part of the reason Nintendo’s online experience isn’t as robust as the competition. They want to make sure only good (or at least complete) games are released on Wii, DS, and 3DS.

       We shouldn’t even have to ask the industry to do this for us. Imagine if you went to see a movie, only to find that that there was no sound in two or three scenes. Imagine if you went to grab a burger from a fast food joint, only to find that it hasn’t been cooked. Seriously, our industry really needs to get their act together on this one, more than any of the other issues on this list.

  

(Classic) Movie Review: The Lion King (1994)

      When “The Lion King” originally came out, I was a wee baby, at just barely a year old. Until this weekend, I have no memory of ever seeing it in theaters. My parents liked the movie a lot when it first came out, as with most of the past and future films in the Disney Renaissance, so they bought most of them on VHS at the time (remember, this is before DVD). I still have all the old tapes of those 90’s Disney movies. So why did I even bother seeing it in theaters this weekend?

       Well, there are two answers to that question: A) because my “Lion King” cassette tape got a lot of usage back in the day, and now it looks like crap on my huge HDTV, and B) because it was in 3-D. I was curious how Disney was going to turn a traditionally, two-dimensionally animated film into a 3-D spectacle. These aren’t computer-created models, they’re drawings. Computers were barely used to create movies back in 1994. Applying 3-D must have been an ambitious and tricky project, and I was worried that, like “The Nightmare Before Christmas”, it would look unnecessary.

       Fortunately, my worries about the 3-D were quickly shattered. “The Lion King” is truly enhanced by the 3-D effects, especially in moments like the “Circle of Life” number and the final battle between Simba and Scar. There are many scenes that simply look awesome in 3-D. One of my major complaints about 3-D has been that you stop noticing it unless it either screws up, or looks really spectacular. Thankfully, for this movie, the latter is true, and although it’s an older film, it’s one of the best uses of 3-D to date.

       And of course, you have the movie itself, which has always been incredible. The story, which is essentially Shakespeare’s “Hamlet” with anthropomorphic animals taking the place of humans, is great as it’s ever been, as is the acting and writing. The songs are catchy as all hell, being a Disney movie. However, Timon and Bumbaa, as the film’s obligatory comic relief characters, have not aged well, and are simply not as funny as I thought they were when I was a young lad. The kids in the audience all laughed at the slapstick, but I wasn’t really as amused as I remember being. But that is a very, very minor drawback, and it’s a great movie not only for kids, but for adults as well.

       So if you can afford the huge price tag (Twelve bucks!? Are you crazy?), then by all means go for it. Those who’ve never seen the movie, or never forgotten it, will be very pleased, especially with the amazing 3-D effects.

Rating: **** 1/2

  

My Thoughts on the Star Wars Prequels and Special Editions

      This is a really controversial subject among nerds everywhere. To many “Star Wars” fans, the prequel trilogy, and the new special editions of the original trilogy, represent George Lucas’s greed and inability to settle on one single concept or story. The prequels ruined the franchise, with horrible acting, a bland script, and of course, the ever-annoying Jar-Jar. At least, that’s their opinion. My opinion is a bit different.

      When I saw the original trilogy, back when I was, like, six, I watched them alongside the prequels as well. The first Star Wars movie I ever saw was Episode IV, but the second movie that I saw was Episode I. Unlike most SW fans, the entire saga holds immense nostalgic value for me. Looking back, sure, the prequels were not as good as the originals, but they still hold up remarkably well. When I first saw Episode I, I had no idea who this Anakin kid was, or what he would become in later movies. Only when I was a little older, and I had seen more of the movies, did things start to click.

       Maybe it’s because I grew up with the prequels as well as the originals, but I don’t think the prequels are nearly as bad as everyone makes them out to be. Sure, looking back, Jar-Jar is annoying as hell, and the dude they hired to play Anakin in Episodes II and III was an awful actor, but the story and effects, and the world that Lucas has created, shines through in the best possible way. The monsters, space battles, and epic lightsaber duels captivated me when I was very young, and now that I’m older, I’m able to understand the surprisingly deep story, and notice the subtle references the newer movies make to the older ones. They truly hold up well.

       Now, part of that is because Lucas has released these newer, enhanced special editions of the original trilogy. I definitely agree that Greedo most certainly did not shoot first, but otherwise, most of the changes are truly made for the better. They let the saga expand to a new audience who wasn’t around back when Lucas and the crew had to rely on puppets, models, and stop-motion. They let the prequels flourish and connect with the originals.

       So even though the prequels and remakes get a bad rap, I actually think they’re quite good. Of course, that’s just my opinion, but I don’t mind the changes, and besides, it’s Lucas’s work. He can change it however he pleases.

Chris's Top 5 Games That Everyone Else Loves, But He Doesn't Care For

There are a lot of games and series that the gamers, the industry, and sometimes even the general public just go ape for. Fortunately for me (and unfortunately for you), there always  has to be a dissenting opinion, and sometimes that opinion belongs to me. So these are five games that everyone else just loves to death, but I don’t really care for. Let’s start with...

#5: THE LEGEND OF ZELDA: OCARINA OF TIME (N64/3DS)
    Yes, I already did a less-than-enthusiastic review of this game (you can read it here: http://bit.ly/o7XLPH),  but TL;DR: I just didn’t find it as good as the plethora of other amazing Zelda titles (“Wind Waker”, for one). The plot and characters have become the standard for future Zelda games, but this unfortunately means that those elements were far more simplistic and average compared to future, and sometimes even past, Zelda games. The game itself, like many other N64 games (but not “Paper Mario”), hasn’t aged well. The graphics, even in the 3DS remake, look outdated. Overall, I didn’t find it that great. It was okay, but not as godlike as gamers make it out to be.

#4: DRAGON’S LAIR (ARCADE)
    Here’s another game that only relies on nostalgia to keep it alive. Don’t get me wrong: Don Bluth is a great artist, and director (sometimes), and I, like countless others, find Princess Daphne quite attractive, but... that’s really all the game has going for it. The game was designed to keep kids plunking in quarters, and that resulted in an antiquated trial-and-error gameplay style that just will not fly in this day and age. It doesn’t have any replay value either; once you’ve beaten the game, you can beat it again really, really easily, and it becomes pointless after a while. Also, the animation looks a bit cheap. Regardless of whether or not you’ve played this dinosaur before, I wouldn’t recommend playing it again.

#3: CALL OF DUTY: MODERN WARFARE 2 (360/PS3/PC)
    Before I begin, no, it wasn’t the lack of dedicated servers that landed this game on the list. I usually don’t mind that kind of thing. Instead, I decided to focus on a few other things. For one, the gameplay of the “Call of Duty” franchise hasn’t budged an inch since the original “Modern Warfare”. Most would think of that as a good thing; after all, CoD is one of the best multiplayer games for a reason. And I like the gameplay of the “Call of Duty” games. What I don’t like is that we have to pay $60 for a new one every single year. CoD is following the path of the “Madden NFL” series; release a new game every year, with different weapons and maps, and everything will be right as rain, right? Wrong. This is the gaming industry, and an artistic medium, and we shouldn’t be following the Apple mentality of releasing the same product every year. I can only pray that “Modern Warfare 3” will be the last game in the series for at least a few years. If not, Activision, then I’m moving over to EA. “Battlefield 3” looks really attractive right now.

#2: Wii SPORTS (Wii)
    It’s November of 2006, and I’m waiting in line at the local Toys ‘R’ Us to pick up that Wii preorder I made a few months ago. It’s very cold, but there’s only, what, 10 minutes to go until midnight? Finally, they start handing out Wiis to the public, and I am one of the first in Anchorage to own a Wii. I gleefully head back home, and my brother and I are eager to try this newfangled “Wiimote”. So we pop in the packaged game, “Wii Sports”, and we have a blast!

...At least until we wake up in the morning to find out that our arms hurt like hell.

Unfortunately, that’s not the only problem that “Wii Sports” finds itself with. There are only so many times that you can play all the games until you get really good at them, and playing them is pointless, until you bring your Wii to a party. But even then, you’re so good, that your expertise overshadows everyone else, and all the sudden, no one wants you to play anymore. But even if you do get really good, you’re still going to struggle with the sometimes infuriating controls, especially in games like Golf. I still haven’t sold the game yet, because of family and friends wanting to play, but I rarely find myself ever playing it.

#1: FINAL FANTASY IV (DS)
    First, a disclaimer: this entry belongs to the DS version, and the DS version alone. The SNES release (sold in America as “Final Fantasy II”), I thought, was very fun and enjoyable. It’s no “Final Fantasy VI”, but it has the excuse not to be. It was older, the SNES was brand new when it came out, and the translation was so bad it was hilarious. “You spoony bard!” remains one of the most (unintentionally) classic phrases in the gaming medium.
    Unfortunately, the plot was a total mess, but with the original translation, that was forgiven somewhat. But when you get to the remastered DS version though, the story has less of an excuse to be this corny and stupid. The translation for the DS version makes more sense, it has less, if any, typos, and many of the vaguer moments from the original translation are made a bit clearer. Normally, I would find this to be a good thing, but now the plot loses it’s one excuse for being as ridiculous as it is.
    Also, Square Enix really ramped up the difficulty in the remastered DS release, making the game unnecessarily hard. I only barely scraped by the Dark Elf boss, and after that, I was thrown into a dungeon with even more difficult monsters than the last. Grinding (the process by which you fight weaker enemies for experience and levels) was pretty much useless, since weaker monsters paid very little experience upon defeat, making the game seem more like a chore.
    The SNES version, even with all it’s typos and plot holes, is still the superior version.